what interests me in a person

I am always trying to find the positive in people as that is what attracts me to them. A sense of humor is always a must as well as the ability to converse.

I am attracted to someone who has a positive attitude, and has a passion for life and knows how to laugh at the good and let go of the past. A twinkle in the eye tells me alot too..........

For me it is all about the personality!!!! Someone who has decent self esteem..who is funny..somewhat outgoing..little drama to none...someone who wants to have fun..and can think with his BRAIN and not the other head. There HAS to be some physical attraction though! I dont want a man who is needy and clingy. I want a man who is independent and does not need to be dependent on a woman!!!

Heidi, I can agree with you totally........there has to be a physical attraction for sure.......and good self esteem is a must. I love a man that has confidence in who he is and is not afraid to let me get to know him. I admire independent men and ambition in life!

What I'm first attracted to is a great smile and nice eyes. If the guy has spikey hair or a military, or is completely bald, I'm drawn to that. I also like tattoos and a goatee, but I've found myself equally attracted to men without them. Also, average or stocky men have my attention.

Once that initial physical attaction is there, I love a great sense of humor, someone outgoing or attentive and showing interest.

There's nothing like being with someone who is into you. What a high!

Sharzi

What attracts me...is a nice smile...friendly eyes...a willingness to talk...being open and honest, but ..first for me...is being tall....and having some meat on his bones..(Im tall!)
ok..I know that sounds...specific? but I love to look up into my mans eyes..as we are slow dancing to our song! (ok so im a romantic at heart)...plus he has to and MUST be able to make me laff...and carry on a good conversation....about anything...and everything...one track minds.... and quiet men ....do NOT attract me....I can listen ...but love to talk too!

Bonnie

Here's an interesting experiment that I'd like to try......

I'd like as many people as possible to name the top 3 personality characteristics of their ideal mate.

Then, when a few chime in, I'll make a very interesting observation.......this is worth watching, and participating in.

My top 3....

1) Real honesty

2) Sense of humor

3) Affectionate


Sharzi

I would say:

1) Has to be a good personality..outgoing..funny...
2) Someone who has similar interests that I do...
3) Has a huge warm caring heart like me
4) There has to be some physical attraction...it is not everything...but there has to be some there!!!!

Well, maybe there are others that have done so in the privacy of their minds

My whole point is/was, this......was the last person that you were in a serious relationship with, or really interested in, any or all of those?

If so, you're on track. If not, then you have to analyze what it is that attracts you to a certain kind of person, because it ain't anything that you're dreaming of in a mate

The last boyfriend I had was all three of the things I listed.... so I thought. When it comes right down to it, he wasn't honest at all.

I'm not talking about the kind of honesty where you tell someone about your past of what you do on a daily basis, but more, the type of honesty where you're afraid of hurting someone but you tell them the truth anyway because you know if you don't, it will hurt them more in the longrun. Unfortunately, I wasn't given the respect I deserved.

Sharzi

i hear ya on that one sharzi..id rather someone was up front and honest about what they expect out of our relationship. even if you are just seeing each other casually there really should be an understanding on that. if im seeing someone and they are telling me im the only one and i find out im not then the trust is gone. just tell me u want to see others and let me have my own choice as to whether i want to still see you like that or not.. i tell everyone i see that im not beholden to anyone. this way they cant say i didnt say anything

You're right... I tell anyone I'm seeing that I don't intend to be exclusive until or unless we both decided that's where it's going. Until then we're free to see whomever we want. I would LOVE that kind of honesty from a man.... so much better than believing he's being exclusive, then you're cheated on and get the wind knocked out of you.

Sharzi

My friends laugh at me (but love me anyway) because my double take look is bald or very short hair, stocky with a goatee. (excuse poor spelling it it is spelled wrong!) Not fat, but an overall stocky build. Now add 'smiley irish eyes' (the look that says "I've earned the laugh lines at the sides of my eyes") and it doesn't get much better for me.
Personality wise...
- a partner who can lead, follow or walk next to me and be equally as comfortable in each position
- someone who doesn't expect life to always be good, because it isn't. Whether is it external factors, or trouble in our relationship, or whatever, I want to know we will be there for each other.
- Someone who expects me to be part of his life . an important part, but not his whole life. Meaning although we will share a lot, we won't have the need to share everything. If I tell him to go out with his friends without me, he will know it's because I love and trust him and not think it's becaue I don't want to be with him. I guess that can be summed up as secure...secure in who he is and secure in the relationship.

Pjay...your take on things and to what attracts you is right on the nose (*almost) for me too... I like a tall man...(Im 5 ft 10) with a nice smile...great laugh...stocky build too...I love facial hair on a man also...(body hair too......) love to run my finger thru his hair....
My ideal..has to have a great personality too...some one I can carry on a great conversation with...without repeating himself again & again...not looking for a man so totally into himself...trying to impress w/ material things...doesnt attract me...actually turns me off...Its a sign of self love...(to distraction of the others feelings and desires) Im looking for someone to share my life too...the following i actually taken from my profile...It fits! :: (a few changes)
I am a lady who stands alone, and would love to have someone stand by my side. Hoping to meet a single/divorced/widowed gentleman to share my life with. He would not walk ahead of me, nor behind me, but truly by my side. Because he's a Gentleman, I know I would be treated like a lady. One never knows until one takes a chance. Willing to take a chance to be able to share and make some memories with me.

I want a man who calls me BEAUTIFUL, instead of HOT. Who calls me back when I hang up on him. I want the guy who KISSES my forehead or my hand. Who wants to show me off to the WORLD even when I'm in sweatpants. Who holds my HAND in front of his friends. Who thinks I'm just as PRETTY without any makeup on. One who often reminds me of how much he CARES, and LOVES being with me, and how he's the LUCKIEST Man in the world to have me. The one who turns to his friends and says "THATS HER." sigh......if only

lol I guess I dont want much... someone who wants to be with me...thru all of lifes ups & downs
..to share new experiences and talk about whatever our hearts desire... walking thru our lives ....together...hey you never know!

just my take...
Bonnie

My sister just let me borrow a book..."He's Just Not Into You"...boy..what an eye opener that was! Seems as if all the men I have dated and even married...were NOT really into me. Including the latest guy that I was totally smitten with. Realizing this hurts really bad! So..where are the right ones? If you say you will call..damit call....if you say you wanna hangout lets make permanent plans...don't just let me wait by the phone for you to call to fit me into your schedule! Argg...

men confuse me....trying to make this work...but men need to realize that we woman give it our all in relationships..and we want the same respect back in one!

there are men out there who want to give it their all. its just a matter of finding that one that you feel the same about me? i am not looking which is probably why i get dates..seems thats how it goes. if i was looking id be still looking !!! lol gotta let nature takes its course and love life regardless and itll come to you

What attracts me to a women is someone who i can relate to. Someone i can be myself around, and doesn't use me for what i know or how i may be able to better them. ( Had enough of that for a life time). A women that can have fun and get down and dirty, and has the girly side as well. Some simalar interests is also a plus.

well whats yer interests???

Well lets see. I like cars, boating, trucks, country music, Flying planes, and riding bikes (bicyles). Working out, and fixing things.

i'd be happy with a woman who ISNT into mind games. how much money you have in the account or who won't leave you stranded to walk home. rob you. screw with your head. lead you by the nose. etc etc. yeah good luck in finding that.